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True friendship -SCOTTISH STYLE!!

(None of thon sissy sh1te)
Are ye tired o' those pish weak 'friendship' poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here are a series o' promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cute wee smiley faces on THIS card .
Just the stone cold truth o a great friendship.

1. When ye are sad -- I will help you get pished and plot revenge against the b@st@rdwho made ye sad.

2. When ye are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking ye.

3. When ye smile -- I will know ye are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.

4. When ye are scared -- I will take the pish oot o you every chance I get,
until you're NO.

5. When ye are worried -- I will tell ye stories about how much worse it could be until YE STOP WHINGING

6... When yer confused -- I will use only wee words.

7... When ye are sick -- Stay away fae me until yer weel again.
I don't want whateverye've got.

8... When ye fall, I will laugh my heed aff at ye, ya clumsy ar5e,
.........but I'll help ye up.

9... This is my oath.... I pledge it tae the end.
'Why?' you may ask;
Because yer ma pal.
Friendship is like pishing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

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