101 Reasons for why the ROV does not work - Trainee Module

Member Joined: Feb 27, 2006

1. I'm just running the winch
2. The sea conditions are to rough
3. The vessel is off position
4. The other Client said to wait for him
5. Survey is offline
6. The Data-logger is getting the next work package
7. Bridge said they got no satelites
8. I can't leave the TMS as the current is to strong
9. DPO is moving vessel
10. The Divers asked us to wait for them
11. Its raining
.....

Member Joined: Mar 04, 2007 Location: South Pacific

1. The electricity is the wrong smell.
2. The oil has the wrong sound.
3. The motors were built on the sabbath and are presently being excommunicated.
4. The vehicle was designed for "in-air" operations only.
5. The water is too wet.
6. The sun is the wrong way around.
7. We can actually see the satellite.
8. Mars is rotating incorrectly today.
9. The DP2 is actually only DP 1.95
10. We have run out of triple manifold overlay sprokets.
11. Our winch is the wrong color for these conditions.
12. Our vessel heading is incorrect for Sky One (TM)

Member Joined: Feb 22, 2004

22. The vessel can't hold position
23. You didn't see that fighter plane?
24. The survey seabat can't even see the deck, what makes you think it'll see the pipe underwater?
25. We're reallocating signal conductors to improve ROV comms (the R word)
26. For the next phase we need the foo foo valve mounted on the tooling manifold
27. Survey are changing the beacons, but I think they have a problem (put someone else in the shit)
28. We're just uploading some more sonar contacts
29. The new environmental green oil has to settle
30. My boss is talking with your boss.
31. The supply boat is tried up alongside

Member Joined: Jun 05, 2004

Number 27 , that is so true Very Happy

that got me in stiches fror ages

32. Were we supposed to go in ?
33. "No one tells me anything" You know who that is Axeman Very Happy

34. The monitors needed cleaning !
35. The logs need to be updated
36. The annual maintenance on the main lift umbilical , just so happens to be now ! Shocked

37. There's a dead sheep in the vertical thruster Shocked

38. err the vertical thruster is missing Confused

39. The specific density of sea-water has dipped below tolerance. We have to replace it before we can proceed. Our buoyancy can't work in these conditions! Laughing

40. My Supervisor told me not to talk you any more coz last time you dropped us in the shit and so sneaky little phising trips need to be refered back to him or else!!!

Member Joined: Dec 10, 2006

41
the russians have got flag on seabed we are not aloud to go down

41. That vent plug Shocked

I thought it was meant to off or else how would it work Confused

Member Joined: Oct 02, 2006 Location: Timbuktu

42. the rs232 is not talking with the flux Capacitors on the circuit with the dilithium crystals,so we cant go into warp drive.

ROVworld Webteam Joined: Dec 26, 2003 Location: Scotland

43. Don't ask me I don't know what the ROV is; I was a chef before doing the training course at Fort William - but I have a bit of paper somewhere that says I'm an ROV Pilot...

Member Joined: Jun 05, 2004

44. We had to bring the ROV up as there is a fire drill sometime today and we don't want to be left out !
45. Very Happy

Since the ROV is on deck due to the fire drill this appears to be an oppotune moment to carry out maintenance to the system.

Member Joined: Aug 25, 2007

46. The computer says no.

Member Joined: Nov 25, 2008 Location: NE Scotland

47. I was told to cut it
48. It was easier to keep going around than come back around
49. I thought it was a good idea to grab the TMS rather than dock
50. Hey look the tunnel thruster is spinning pretty fast....shit we've lost comms/video.

Member Joined: May 19, 2009

simulation credit auto
Good day you guys Laughing